Watching those Western shows such as The OC and One Tree Hill, I often think that their lives were plain drama. I thought those lies on which their life revovles at are just pure pigment of the writer's imagination. I never thought of it as posible, considering our age.

But then, again, it's real.

Lies, as major as Lucas having that sickness, are real and possible. I just discovered that I had been living with a lie eversince God knows when.

I always lied and I had been lied to, here and there, about matters that are not of such graveness. I wonder why I am so affected by this one.

A person dearest to me is gay. Not just subtle gayness but gay to the point that s/he looks at men porn sites. (My issues with homosexuality is another topic.) Anyway, this gay man, I thought was straight. I even complained to him since my prospect, I discovered, is also gay. Apparently, he also is. And he even has a boyfriend right now. It hurts since I always thought of him as my adviser, my guy to run to when problems pour over me. When I need him, he's there; to pick me up, to buy me stuff, to treat me dinner, to research for me, to save me from my mother's yabbling. No romantic attachment here, okay. It's just that I can't get over the fact that he is gay, with a cute boyfriend, with bills on his pocket spent on this cute boyfriend. It sucks.

And I'm not even in Tree Hill.


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Two roads divereged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
- Road Not Taken by Robert Frost