I knew and believe that he is not the person he seem to be. I know he puts all these faces to hide what's true. I believe a lot of bad things actually about him. But, my heart chose to feel this thing. 'Thing' because I don't know what it's called. However, this thing is definitely not like, not even hate, nor love. But there's something sweet and special between us, I just don't know what.
The conflict is, I'm getting more and more confused. A friend helped instilled in me that he is something else. That he is not the person he seem to be. But, that person doesn't believe anymore. Damn. All he did was to deny it convincingly for my friend to turn her back on everything she used to believe.
What sucks is that I believe that everything is true, everything is the sad truth. But, I still have this 'thing' for him, which makes me kind of stupid.
Then, the second guy came into picture. This 2nd guy, S. He's someone I really like. He's been there for me eversince, though not all the time, but he never left for good, always coming back when I need him. We're just close friends. As much as my heart would want more than that, my mind doesn't want to. And all my friends, also doesn't want to. Gee, bakit ba "thinking person" ako?
I don't want to think about them anymore. Let's see God's plans for me.
But, the existential theory, it's my choice?! It's my choice what to believe and whom to love. Hahahaha!
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Two roads divereged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
- Road Not Taken by Robert Frost
